Looking Back Over 2012 and Ahead to 2013

Yesterday, I was looking over credit card receipts for the year and found something surprising.  It is now taken care of.

So, today, while 3/5 of my family is skiing and I've completed taken a first stab at a health economics second course syllabus, I thought it would be a good time for my annual aspirations blog.  I'll call them aspirations rather than resolutions.  At least according to dictionary.com, a resolution is "a resolve or determination" whereas an aspiration is a "goal or objective desired" or an "aim; ambition". I think that what I look forward to in the next year fits more in the second category of "big picture" stuff rather than specific determinations.  And I think that with a few exceptions the same could have been said last year.

Looking back, then?  Here is what I wrote last December 31:


(10) Continue to implement a plan for well-being that includes financial well-being.
Sort of.  We've built some assets.  Paid down some debt.  Some still hangs on.  And it has been difficult to anticipate what 2013 will bring.

(9) Run a sub-20 minute 5K and qualify for the Boston marathon. 
These were definitely in the resolution rather than aspiration category and I met both.

(8) Continue my involvement with Back on My Feet.
I did.  I stayed a team coach as long as I could, but something had to give way.  I still run with the Team at least once a week if at all possible and also run with a bunch of BoMF Baltimore teammates at track workouts that I somehow have been the nominal organizer of for a while now.

(7) While this could go under the well-being heading of #10, I want to integrate pieces of “the arts” into what I do including more reading (because one way to write better is to read more), continue blogging, continue other writing, and perhaps even get back to writing a bit of music.
On this one, I continued to blog, I started a second writing project, and while I never wrote a full song this year, I did finalize a poem for two friends who got married and they really liked it.  It was about what made a first impression about each of them as I met them--their smiles.

(6) Better balance of responsibilities at work.
I have mostly continued to learn what can "give way".  The new year may bring new opportunities here.

(5) Hang out with friends more in situations other than running.
There is precious little time for this.  Although we did make it to a few nice gatherings at the end of the year.  And while my oldest son's girlfriend was not someone I had thought of when I wrote this a year ago, we have welcomed her to hang out with us (and running is not involved) a lot more this year than last.

(4) Help my children become all that they can be.
We continue to find ways to provide opportunities for our three sons to try out and to get better at all sorts of interesting things.  I think that Sherry and I have done a good job at this.

(3) Take the serenity prayer ever more seriously. 
I definitely still take the first part very seriously.  It is interesting that I will simply speak--sometimes not even yell--a snarky comment about another driver and let it go at that.  My oldest son's girlfriend asked if it was my form of "road rage".  What it really reflects is my effort to let out a little frustration while otherwise letting go of whatever might cause road rage as I cannot change it and more or less have to accept what other drivers do.  There are still some things that go unacted on.  I strive to change that.

(2) Continue to share my cooking. Enough said.
And done. Mostly through having my son's girlfriend over for dinner more.  She even had a chance to help us make Christmas Eve dinner.  But I have also cooked for family on this vacation and have brought snacks for friends post-running on numerous occasions.

(1) Enjoy the second half of my 20th year of marriage and the first half of year 21. It has been an incredible nearly 20 years. I hope we share 20 more.

Year wasn't perfect, but we had some new experiences that served us well including going on our first cruise.  And we are still together.

Looking ahead...

(10) Keep running in the right place in my life--it should promote physical, mental, and social well being--the gold old health triangle we learned in high school health ed class.  It should also promote spiritual well-being. If it ever interferes with those re-assess.

(9) While keeping it in the right place in my life, don't forget that there are some real goals.  Mile on the track under 5:40.  2-mile on the track under 12:00.  5K--wherever--under 19:30.  Complete Boston--and if the weather permits aim for 3:10.  Half marathon closer to 1:30.  10 miler closer to 1:10.

(8) Continue to be creative.  Maybe art.  Maybe words.  I'd say 10-15 minutes per day.  Could be a little verse.  Could be a little progress in my ongoing attempts to write longer stuff.  Could be a blog entry.  Could even just be some project like the silk tie I did earlier this week.  Just to keep that part of my brain in high gear.

(7) Think about next career steps.  Who knows what they may be?  The key is that even as a full professor, there are things to think about.  Even if I stay a full professor at the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health for the remainder of my career, the job will change.  And there may be opportunities within JHU (or someday in the future outside JHU) that would bring about even more changes and hopefully changes that would challenge me and engage me in new ways.  And while my well-being now is about stability, my well-being once the kids are out of high school and college will depend on what I see as my next steps.  So, I might as well start thinking now.

(6) Continue to grow spiritually.  I have stopped writing about every single bib number and race time.  That was fun.  But I have found many new inspirations for my spirituality including the tattoo that is now nearly finished.  That turned out to be an interesting part of my art experience last years as it really has become much like a piece of commissioned artwork that I always have with me and really participated in a two-person (me and the artist) effort to bring about a vision of symbolism that I had.

(5) Continue to play an active role at St. Pius X.  I don't see that changing for any reason--but it is just worth putting out there.  No matter what other pressures may come and go, the stability of my involvement in Sunday school and the worship band--each with its own set of ups and downs--is definitely like a rock for my to stand on in my faith and in my life.

(4) Continue to mentor.  The experience or mentoring has been a gift to me as much as anything from me over the past several years.  I have a new student to mentor in the Penn State Schreyer Honors College and there are other opportunities for mentorship as well.

(3) Help my two oldest on the path to figuring out where they will go to college and high school respectively.  While the process will not be completely finished one year from today, it will be well on its way.

(2) Remember that I would not be where I am without the help of others.  This is part of what I reflected in my artistic vision last year and what I hope to continue to reflect this year.  This is part of my spirituality.  It is part of my professional mentoring.  It is part of my family relationships.  It is part of being a good neighbor.  I am ultimately responsible for me.  But I am not responsible for just me.  And in the same way, I know that I have truly benefitted from having so many around me who are not only interested in benefitting themselves but who are interested in lifting up others.  When I am taking credit, I must give credit where credit is due. And when I am deciding how to act, I should remember to act with others in mind.

(1) Be the best family member I can be.  Husband, father, son, brother, and so many more rolls.  All important.  All provide ways to lift others up.  All provide ways to reflect on what others have done to lift me up.  And all provide ways to show God's greatness in blessing me and my family with abundance.

It should be an exciting year ahead.  

Celebrating that Christ is Risen

I don't usually write two entries in one day.  I just have a quick idea for another entry and I'll count this as tomorrow's.  At mass today, Father Sam Lupico commented on how today is the last Sunday that we celebrate the Easter season--in other words the last Sunday that we celebrate Jesus rising from the dead and being with his disciples until the Ascension.  He commented on how the celebration of Jesus's rising seems to come and go on Easter Sunday itself.  He contrasted this with his experience in at least one Greek Orthodox church in which they were still greeting each other with "Jesus is risen" even this week.  I thought about this observation and my blog.  I spent a lot of time preparing for Easter and then have left it behind.  Part of the reason is the simple fact that I have needed to return to some other things that didn't occur as I spent a lot of time working on the blog each day of the Lenten season.  But, I have felt compelled to get back to it.  I miss the focus on my spirituality.  I don't know if other's share this issue--that so much effort is spent preparing for Easter that once it is here it is hard to keep up the celebration.  But Father Sam made the point that the joy of the Resurrection should continue.  So, I will probably write shorter entries, but my goal will be to get back to more entries.  More entries that force me to bring my spiritual health back into focus as much as my physical health all year long.  

Low Impact

Another day.  Another workout.  More pondering.  Today, the theme is low impact.  Not surprisingly, I was on the exercise bike for 30 minutes and the elliptical for 30 minutes.

How does “low impact” relate to my life?  Do I try to make a low impact on the world?  In some ways, yes.  Recycling.  Careful use of the resources for which we are supposed to be God’s stewards. 

In other ways, no.  I try to have an impact on a lot of people through my work.  Heck, the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health’s motto is “Saving lives…millions at a time”.  I don’t think I’ve saved millions.  I may not even have saved one.  While I have tried to have an impact on a lot of people in a lot of different research areas, I would say that my method of impact is “low impact” or perhaps “gentle impact”.

In what way?  I don’t say “It’s economics or bust!”  I don’t force my ideas on people.  I try not to come to any collaborative or teaching situation with preconceived notions.  Instead, I try to come at each opportunities with open eyes and an open mind and share ideas.  Share concepts.  Teach and learn.  Speak politely and listen.

Does it always work?  No.  No plan of mine has always worked.  No philosophy I’ve tried has ever turned out to be 100% foolproof.  Nothing in my life has turned out to work just the way it was intended 100% of the time.

However, there is plenty of evidence that taking a low impact or gentle impact approach does help to develop good collegiality, nice collaboration, and open doors. 

So, once again, my exercise of the day, a low impact workout not beating on my knees.  Low impact collaboration not “beating on” my colleagues.  Both work together in my life. 

And, tor bring it back to the spiritual, in the New Testament, even Jesus was “low impact” most of the time.  Of course, there was the time when he cleared the temple of those who were performing commercial transactions there.  Not so low impact, of course.  And there was the crucifixion.  Obviously, also not low impact.  However, most of his preaching, most of his teaching, and most of his doing were definitely low impact.  One of the best stories to illustrate this in my mind was the one where the woman was about to be stoned.  Jesus just sat in the sand and drew in the sand and challenged anyone sinless to throw the first stone.  Little more was said.  No one knows exactly what he was drawing or writing in the sand.  Then he forgave the woman and things went on.  Great example of a low impact way to have a high impact on the world.   

When Things are Right with the World

For my friends who don't believe in something higher than us, this is an entry you may not appreciate.

For my friends who think that things just happen and that there when things come together they are simply a coincidence, this is an entry you may not appreciate.

But for my friends who believe that connecting with something that is higher (I think of God, others may have alternative concepts) can help to make life better, this is an entry for you.

All my writing and pondering recently is part of what I call, "Running, Reflecting, and Writing".  Not quite 3 R's (since writing begins with W), but the alliteration works.  In the process of running, reflecting, and writing, I have not been "praying" per se, but to quote an old friend, it is like living the prayer.  Two types of prayer are thanksgiving and intercession, and I consider my search for meaning to be part thanksgiving and part intercession--thanks for showing me the way so far, and God please help me to continue to do what I am supposed to be doing.

So, today, after spending weeks pondering and trying to connect my running, my spirituality, and a bigger picture, I feel like God answered a few prayers.

First, today was the first long run since I twisted my ankle that my ankle felt fine.  My ankle is still not ready to make quick turns in different directions as I would need to running down a basketball court, but for straight running, the ankle is better and almost all my muscles are now feeling good.  A person could say, "It is just the right time."  I think that it is part of a prayer being answered for wellness.

Second, today I was accompanied by another runner on my 8 mile run.  For miles 2-8 we ran an average 8:10.  It was excellent to have the company of another runner at that speed. We conversed as we ran.  I found out that she has run a faster personal best half marathon than I have and that sooner or later I may be working to keep up with her.  I still love running with the other runners I've been running with for weeks, but I am very happy to have a new running partner for the next several weeks and hopefully then into the marathon training season over the summer.  Another prayer answered.  I am still giving (and not just receiving), as our coach commented that he was glad to find someone who could keep up with her and I could share with her what I know about marathon running, as, so far, she has not run a marathon.

Third, I attended a former advisee's wedding today.  He and his wife are both of Nigerian descent.  The wedding was at a Redeemed Christian Church of God. It was a wonderful celebration of the love of my student and his wife for each other, and it was also a wonderful celebration of people wanting to be at a church and people wanting to feel the power of God.  Being at a celebration where everyone seemed like they wanted to be there, wanted to feel the power of God, and wanted to be closer to God was a wonderful experience.  The music (a mixture of modern--including a six string bass, a saxophone, a drum set, an African drum, and a keyboard--and traditional hymns) was wonderful and showed a way in which a non-Catholic congregation related to God.  It was a wonderful example of the many ways that different people relate to the higher power that I believe in. Another prayer answered--reaffirmation of a visible relationship with God.

I hope that my relationship with God can continue to grow in meaningful ways--through prayer, through action, through family, and through running.

Borrowing from my favorite local running store--"live. give. run."

There are two really cool running stores that I enjoy in the Baltimore area.  That is not to say that there are not others that I have not experienced.  Just that I have really liked two.  One is called Falls Road Running.  I bought my first pair of decent running shows at that store.  A colleague has been a long-time customer of theirs and knows the owner well.  And the store supports several Baltimore Marathon practice runs on the course (with water and gels) in preparation for the Baltimore Marathon in the fall.  Nice place.

The other store is Charm City Run.  If you click on their link you will see the words "live. give. run." right near the top of the stores home page.  The store has excellent training groups, does a lot of community work, and is the official organization for registering and timekeeping at many of the local 5K runs that my son and I have participated in locally.  I love the people an the organization.

So, why do I bring up either one?  Well, I've certainly extolled the virtues of the Charm City Run training groups and approach to selling shoes in prior blog entries.  But today, I am going to focus on their slogan "live. give. run."  It seems to fit quite nicely with other things I have been pondering this week.

Back on My Feet is, for me, the answer to how I can live out the simple philosophy espoused by Charm City Run.  Live, give, run.

Live--live life to the fullest; life for the moment; live in the now; accept what life gives us to live with; help other people to live to their full potential.

Give--give it all you got (break into Chuck Mangione); give till it hurts; give from the heart; don't just give from your excess (thank Jesus for that quote).

Run--don't run from things; run for fun; run for health; run to achieve a goal; run to socialize; run to show commitment.

What more could a person ask for?  I have seen the theme every time I go to the store's website.  I wonder why it took me so long to realize that living life that way could be a good thing.  I wonder why it took my so long to find an organization that helps me to realize this theme.

But I don't wonder too hard.  At this point, I just appreciate that I have it figured out and am leave it to God to lead me to the next step in the incredible spiritual development I've had the good fortune to enjoy.